By Audrey Sellers
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Busy is the new black, and every-brbody wants to be in style. But it'sbrno longer just adults who leadbrfast-paced, frenetic lives – kidsbrare busier than ever. Nearly six in 10brchildren participate in extracurricularbractivities, according to the U.S. CensusbrBureau, and three out of four Americanbrfamilies with school-aged children have atbrleast one playing an organized sport – a totalbrof about 45 million kids, according to thebrBoston Globe.br
In Southlake, accolades are a testa-brment to just how much kids are investedbrin academics and extracurricular activities. Carroll just made history as the firstbrdistrict in newly formed Class 6A to win thebr2015 UIL Lone Star Cup. This award is be-brstowed annually to six high schools – one inbreach of the six UIL classifications – with thebrstate's best academic and athletic programs.br
Flip to page 38, and you'll find our “FivebrOnes to Watch” story on exceptional incom-bring Carroll seniors. Clearly, a lot of kids havebra lot going on – and they're excelling in whatbrthey do. Kids are busy, certainly, but are theybrtoo busy? It depends.br
“There is some evidence that havingbractivities to do, especially if parents arebrnot around, is really beneficial for youthbr– particularly in early adolescence,” saysbrAmy R. Murrell, Ph.D., Associate Professor ofbrPsychology at the University of North Texas.br“However, if a five-year-old, who could bebrhaving dinner with her parents and sib-brlings, is instead at art class on Monday eve-brnings, dance on Tuesdays, gymnastics onbrWednesdays, and so on, that might be abrdifferent story.”
The Benefits of Being Busy
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Being busy sometimes gets a bad rap, but there are manybrupsides to kids staying active. They can explore differentbrinterests, engage with other kids, develop social skills, andbruncover their natural interests and talents.br
They also learn how to effectively manage their time – abrskill they'll no doubt need in adulthood. Because they'll be sobrbusy, of course.br
“Time-management skills arebrimportant as children progressbrinto adolescence and beyond,”brsays Kristy S. Hagar, Ph.D., abrlicensed psychologist in Col-brleyville who works with children,bradolescents and adults. “Hav-bring a family model of how tobrappropriately manage a va-brriety of tasks and activitiesbr– as well as learning whenbrto recognize when it becomes toobrmuch – is a good lifelong skill tobrlearn.”br
And then there's the oldbrexpression: Idle hands are thebrdevil's playground. When kidsbrare busy, they have less timebrto get in trouble. Female high-brschool athletes are 92 percentbrless likely to get involved withbrdrugs and 80 percent less likelybrto get pregnant than non-athletes,braccording to the Women's SportsbrFoundation.
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There are benefits from an academic standpoint, too. Kids who participate in extracurricular activities have a 15-brpercent higher classroom attendance rate than students whobrare not involved, according to the National Center for Edu-brcation Statistics. Students who don't miss classes are morebrlikely to have a higher GPA, and thus have improved collegebropportunities. The benefits just keep piling up. But, so canbrthe downsides.
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When Busy Becomes Bad
If kids are overscheduled – when they're booked down to thebrhalf-hour with classes and extracurricular activities in a never-brending cycle of busyness – something has got to give. Most of-brten, it's sleep.br
“Kids end up delaying their bedtime to get their schoolworkbrdone after they've done their extracurricular activities, andbrthey end up short sleeping – not getting enough sleep everybrnight,” says William T. Goldman, M.D., P.A., of Southlake Psy-brchiatric & Counseling Center. “This creates a cumulative sleep-brdeprivation effect.”br
Kids need sleep, and when they're not getting adequatebrrest on a regular basis, it negatively impacts every aspect ofbrtheir lives. They're moody. They can't concentrate. They forgetbrthings. Kids are just like adults who are sleep-deprived – onlybrtheir bodies are still growing and need that rest.br
“Sleep is such an important factor because it can impairbrthe regulation of the secretion of growth hormone, which isbrimportant for kids going through puberty. You want them tobrreach their full height potential,” Dr. Goldman says. “And frombra mental health perspective, kids just need time to chill out and do nothing. They need to give their brains a bit of a vacationbrat times.”
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Everybody needs a break – especially kids. When they gobrnonstop and they're expected to perform at the highest levelsbracademically and in their extracurricular pursuits, the stressbrcan take a toll.br
“If overscheduling leads to an increase in stress, you mightbrsee fewer resources to cope with other daily hiccups that arebrpart of life,” Dr. Hagar says.br“That may result in feelingsbrof being chronically over-brwhelmed, which may increasebranxiety. In more extreme cases,brsignificant anxiety or moodbr
problems might arise.”
It's important to rememberbr
that kids are just that – kids.brThey're not meant to be “on” allbrthe time.br
“As kids get into adoles-brcence, they need down time.brTheir bodies are changing, andbrthey need time to rest, relaxbrand recharge their batteriesbrjust like we do,” says EricabrZwernemann, M.D., a pediatri-brcian with Southlake FamilybrMedicine. “When kids aren'tbrgetting adequate rest, it reallybrdoes impact their health.”br
Elementary-age kids shouldbrclock nine to 10 hours of sleepbrat night, she says, and high-br
school kids need at least seven or eight hours.
Sleep isn't the only thing that takes a hit when kids'br
schedules start to stack up. Family time can also suffer whenbrkids are overbooked. “That's one of the worst things I see aboutbroverscheduling,” says Dr. Zwernemann. “The more things thatbrare going on, the more it pulls families away from family din-brner – from spending time together.”br
Sixty years ago, the average family dinner was 90 minutes.brToday, it's less than 12 minutes, according to the Six O' ClockbrScramble, a site that helps busy families connect at the dinnerbrtable.
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Nearly everyone is feeling the dinnertime crunch. A poll bybrNPR, the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation, and the HarvardbrSchool of Public Health found that 46 percent of survey respon-brdents say eating together is difficult to do on a regular basis.br
But the benefits of family dinners are huge. Kids who sharebrfamily dinners three or more times per week are less likely tobrbe overweight and engage in risky behaviors, according to thebrJournal of Adolescent Health. They're more likely to eat healthybrfoods and perform better academically. And, perhaps the bestbrbenefit, they have better relationships with their parents.br
“Research has consistently demonstrated that families whobrspend time together, such as committing to family meals atbrleast a few times a week, tend to cope better with life's dailybrdemands,” Dr. Hagar says.br
Going Full-Throttle
Rhonda Gruenewald knows what it's like to have a family that'sbralways on the go. This Southlake mom has four athletes: Taylorbr(20), Payton (19), Brayden (18) and Mitchell (14). Though life is less hectic now that she only has two kids liv-bring at home, Gruenewald and her family havebrlearned how to embrace being busy.
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She and her husband, Trevor, started their kidsbrin organized sports when each child was threebryears old. Over the years, their kids participatedbrin a number of sports and extracurricular activi-brties: gymnastics, soccer, tee ball, piano, scouts,brand religious education, just to name a few.br
“I like to call our lives ‘happy chaos.' We wouldbrsometimes have over 30 games in one weekend,”brshe says. “It was insane. The amount of gas webrwould go through in the DFW area was crazy. Webralways did our best to divide and conquer, andbrhave one of us at each game.”br
Gruenewald uses a Mac calendar to keep ev-breryone organized. She color-codes each familybrmember, and when she adds an event, it goes di-brrectly on to that person's calendar. She includesbrall the need-to-know information: address, direc-brtions, jersey color, and any other important de-brtails.br
She feels blessed to have moved to Southlakebrsix years ago. “This area has so much talent, andbrso many wonderful coaches and teachers whobrhave helped our kids excel,” she says.br
Taylor plays indoor and sand volleyball at CalbrPoly San Luis Obispo, and Payton plays soccer atbrMississippi State. Brayden is an incoming Carrollbrsenior who plays indoor and sand volleyball, andbrplays defense on the Carroll varsity volleyballbrteam. Mitchell, an incoming Carroll freshman,brhas played a variety of sports as a Dragon andbrwas most recently the District Champion in polebrvault.br
“We are a very close family and we have alwaysbrmaintained four core priorities in our lives: faith,brfamily, fitness and work – schoolwork or sportsbrteams,” Gruenewald says. “Due to our schedules,brwe find time for very little else. But for us, it's allbrbeen worth it. We have loved every minute of itbrand have had a lot of fun along the way.”
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Finding Balance
That's what matters. If kids are enjoying their ex-brtracurricular involvement, it can be an incrediblybrenriching experience – for kids and their families.br
“Everything in moderation is the key,” says Dr.brHagar. “So many activities and a variety of sportsbrare available to both boys and girls at youngerbrand younger ages – and that can be very positive.”br
It all comes down to balance. Families need to-brgether time, and kids need down time in order tobrthrive. If the scale tips too heavily towards beingbrbusy, it may be time to reprioritize.br
“Take a good assessment of your core valuesbras a family,” suggests Dr. Goldman. “Think aboutbrhow you can arrange your time to allow an opti-brmal balance of activities, rest and relaxation, andbrfamily bonding.”br
When kids' schedules are so jam-packed, itbrmay indeed be “happy chaos,” as Gruenewaldbrputs it. But as long as there's an element of happybrin all the busyness, being busy isn't so bad.